is the word 'diary' better than the word 'blog'? probably not.

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Ownership of the Frownie!

Ownership of the Frownie!

In my last entry I mentioned turning a frownie into a brownie, which is an unofficially trademarked Evany expression. I didn�t credit her with it when I wrote it, but later on I wondered whether I should have, because I think too much, and sometimes about the wrong things. I�m not sure what the conventions are for quoting people in the course of conversation. Because a diary doesn�t seem like a scholarly or journalistic enterprise where citations naturally gather. It�s more like a conversation one has with oneself while also being aware that there is a dimly defined audience involved. And also, when quoting something that isn�t coming directly from something I�ve read, but rather exists as part of the air around me because it is a phrase used amongst my friends, again, I�m not sure how citing such a thing would work. It would be like having to justify the origin of every word you use. But I certainly wouldn�t want to seem like I was trying to take credit for cleverness that isn�t mine. Especially not given all the na�ve plagiarism I see my students engaged in fairly constantly. I guess in my own head it is so clear that Evany is like 18,000 times more funny than me, and much more language-clever, that when I do use one of her phrases, citing her would be redundant because 99% of anyone who reads my webdiary reads hers too, and most of the people who read my diary also probably know Evany, so they know what�s what.

Just another moment of me overthinking something perhaps. After a moment of underthinking it? And now here you have me thinking out loud about it. Except that I�m not really thinking out loud, because not only am I not making any noise save for typing as I think this, but also you are not hear to listen to my noise-making to ascertain whether or not I AM thinking out loud. You see? The diary is an odd location.

It also makes me wonder about language. When someone coins a term, does he or she own it? Or is it the way of language to be used and abused and never owned by anyone? What makes great literature great partakes of both sides of that binary opposition. A work of great literature ought to be credited to its author (let us ignore Foucault and �What Is An Author?� for just a moment), but also, great literature (or even just a pleasing piece of text) is made possible by all the other words used and word-combinations strung together before its existence, by other people who may or may not get credit for what they contributed to the way the mind of the �author� in question works. (For an utterly beautiful and brilliant take on this read Denise Riley�s The Words of Selves.) We are all formed, no matter what the strength and extent of our individuality and/or creativity, by outside influences (for better and for worse) that we may or may not even take note of. Our parents, their taste in books and music, our friends, their tastes, advertising, cultural preconceptions, conventions, �ways of acting� that don�t get questioned, movies, the sum total of books and magazines and pleasing pieces of text we�ve read. There is a real way in which I could never give credit to everything that has made what I think and then write possible.

However, Evany totally owns turning a frownie into a brownie, along with large piece of my heart.

Yesterday I spent the day going through old boxes and reading old letters, many of which were from friends forgotten, or friends no longer amongst the living, and that was a moving experience, in part because it reminded me of influences that still act in me whether or not I�m conscious of it. More about that later. Right now I have to do some freaking work!

3:16 p.m. - June 23, 2005

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