is the word 'diary' better than the word 'blog'? probably not.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Election Hangover.
Election Hangover.
First, here are some friends of mine as represented by mugs on my kitchen table.
So. The Election. (This reminds me that once, four years ago, a Japanese student of mine asked me whether I was worried about The Erection. Luckily I knew right away that he had traded an 'r' for an 'l'. But oh how I laughed once he had left the office. And, really, now I laugh almost every time someone makes a statement about The Election. Because I am TWELVE YEARS OLD.)
Every petty little problem in my own life seems somehow simultaneously better and worse now that I know that there will be four more years of this horseshit. So, on the one hand, the fact that I fell for someone too selfish to be careful with other human beings pales in comparison to the ramifications of the world this country is creating by being what it is. But, on the other hand, here I am, a little sad, a little lonely, and, IN ADDITION, political realities SUCK. WHY EVEN GET OUT OF BED?! I'm not going to say much about this right now, nor am I going to deign to type the name of the person heading this country straight into the next age of empire. I'll just put forth a few of the reasons why this is a worry that lasts much longer than the next four years: The Supreme Court; What Europeans Think; What Muslims Think; The Economy, and Who Will Be Paying for All This Folly; and, finally, The Fact that There Is No Common Good in this Country Anymore.
What do I mean by that? Well, when 50% of the people vote for one guy, and believe that the other guy is a dangerous foolhardy renegade, and then the other 50% of the people vote for that guy, and think that the other guy is a dangerous foolhardy renegade, just where is the common good? This country is BROKEN. There is no political theory around to tell us what kind of nation is composed of people who cannot agree on at least a few basics. Heidi was positing that we live in a world of moral segregation. We for the most part don't intermix with those who so violently believe the opposite of what we think is right. (Although some of these 'others' are my students, given where I am right now. But that's its own kind of segregation.)
So here's a report on the state of mind of various of my friends. One spent all yesterday crying. Indeed when I went to lunch yesterday I decided not to sit with wine-and-ice-cream-political-scientist because I could not yet face the large-perspective story he was about to hand to me. I was afraid it would make me cry, and I did not want to cry while lecturing to young people about John Rawls' "ideal theory" of liberal government (irony! irony!). One friend's father is very angry at The Gays for not holding off on Their Issue until a non-election year. Another friend's father is constructing very elaborate conspiracy theories, past, present and future. Evany is taking a bath. (I have mentioned before this funny difference in our reactions to depression: I spend days in pajamas without showering, she spends days in the bathtub. That's probably why she is more popular than I am. That, and she's nicer, funnier and more likely to talk to strangers.)
On a lighter note, I spent last weekend in Memphis. I was at a conference called "Society for Phenomenology and Existential Philosophy" aka SPEP. I would say more, but I'm going to be reporting on the conference for McSweeney's in coming weeks. I'll let you know when that happens. Anyway, it was fun to see some friends, including a whole bunch of people with whom I spent that summer in Italy. Some cute young boys flirted with me. Oh, and I finally managed to give away the dog-tag necklace with my face engraved on it. When I got it and started wearing it as a necklace I thought that was a bit narcissistic, and so the story was that I would give it to the first person who asked for it, and that I would tell people that whenever they asked about it. And then no one ever asked. So, at a huge raging party last Saturday night, as a friend of mine was smashing a mosquito on my neck, someone else said, "hey, what's that necklace?" I gave the stock answer. And then my mosquito-squashing friend said, "I want it." And so I gave it to her. And that is how a very smart and cute lesbian professor from the south came to have a necklace with my face on it. Aw!
In other news, unfortunately a certain british philosopher with whom I was once involved was also in attendance at SPEP. I had not expected to see him there, because he had once said he would NEVER go to SPEP, for some set of political reasons. But there he was. It was a) good to see him and realize that I no longer want him to be my boyfriend/whatever and b) annoying to encounter yet another guy I have to file in the "disappointing" folder. Because so much of what he is is good, but there are absolutely fatal flaws past which I am unable to glance. OMG: I did say something very very funny if also very mean to him. We were standing around in a circle with some other people and a book editor. The editor said to him, "Hey, we need a heavyweight of philosophy like you to edit this series." He said, "Are you saying I'm fat?" I said (pleased), "HA! You got that joke from me!" (who got that joke from Evany). He turned to me and said, "Are you saying my bum looks big in this suit?" And I said, "Well, there IS an ass in that suit, of that we can be certain." Everyone laughed. And then I had lunch with him, so I suppose he was not mortally wounded. Indeed, one of the disappointing things about him is that he is so impervious to true criticism that he will probably never be truly deeply affected by any other person. Part of me hopes that is not true. But the rest of me suspects that it is. The End.
12:04 p.m. - November 04, 2004
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
